Ask Helix about Alyce the Sheep

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Your question and Helix's answer may appear on the Bleating Hearts page.

Question:
"I've just got an idea how you could do your love Alyce a pleasure. In Germany, we have the old, old, old tradition that the boy puts a young birch tree with colored ribbons in front of the door of the girl he's in love with during the night from April 30th to May 1st. Do you have this tradition in the U.S., too?" (Christine)


Answer:
Unless a human can suggest a store to order a young, birch tree online, it is difficult for him to obtain any type of shrubbery while being trapped indoors. However, Helix does celebrate a similar May Day custom. On the morning of May 1st, Helix surprised Alyce by tying a blue ribbon around his right horn. Alyce was clearly moved by this gesture of love and affection by her most orange sew-mate.

Ask Alyce

Lately, Helix has received a lot of "What does Alyce think...?" type of questions. Helix has forwarded these to his wooly love to answer.

Question:
"What does Alyce think of the Flirt with Helix section?" (Darren)

Answer:
"Alyce is uneasy about the idea of other creatures (human or non-human) flirting with Helix. However, she has kept a typically sheepish silence on this matter, perhaps not wanting to rock the boat."
(Alyce the Sheep)

Question:
"How does Alyce feel about the CPM?  Is she willing to deal with him or would you have to move?" (Sheena)

Answer:
"Thats a tough one.. Alhough she's a gentle ewe, Alyce would in fact prefer to be as far away from the CPM as posible, because of the frightening things he could do with her inner bag compartment if he tried. Inner bag is PRIVATE, straps are PRIVATE - when will anyone learn? Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!"
(Alyce the Sheep)
Question:
"I regret that I have no straps.  But since Alyce has straps, does that make you think less of her? She did not deliberately deceive you, did she?  She is still the same sheep she always was. Have you talked to her yet?" (Sheena)

Answer:
Helix does not feel deceived by Alyce. Yes, he was surprised when he first learned she had straps but Helix freely admits that he never came right out and asked Alyce, "Are ewe a stuffed sheep?"?

Helix's opinion of Alyce hasn't changed a bit since he made this discovery. However, Alyce's opinion of him does appear to be changing. Alyce was a little upset with him when he posted pictures of her straps on his site. It didn't help matters much when Helix also shared pictures of him in his pre-Alyce days, mating with a fuzzy sweater. Alyce now has doubts about their relationship and is soliciting your advice on her website about what she should do next.
Should Alyce forgive Helix for his murky past?

Alyce has explained to Helix that straps are considered shameful and she tries to keep hers hidden. Helix understands that females can sometimes be self-conscious, but he thinks Alyce's straps are sexy. Helix also wonders what else she might be hiding underneath that beautiful wool. Maybe in time, Alyce will forgive Helix and he will find out! Helix is concentrating on ways to make it up to his "sew-mate" and get Alyce to accept his apology.
Question:
"Are things getting steamy yet with you and Alyce? It's a shame if they aren't. You would make a great couple. Does she have any single, unhairy friends for me? (Ellen)

Answer:
Things have gotten very steamy between monster and sheep. After their first mating on the creepy puppet master's love seat, Helix and Alyce are inseparable. Helix has even let Alyce put her trotter in his puppet hole. That shows a lot of trust on Helix's part!

But, does Alyce have an equal amount of trust in him? Helix doesn't know if she has any single, unhairy friends because Alyce hasn't introduced Helix to any of her friends. Is she ashamed that she's dating a monster? Will her sheep friends and family accept Helix into the flock? Helix is trying to be patient with Alyce and not rush her. But, for Helix, this is a red flag!

Question:
"Are Helix and Alyce going to have a wedding someday entitled 'My Big Fat Puppet Wedding'?" (Meg)

Answer:
Helix is not sure that he likes the implications of this question. Are you suggesting that Helix is a big, fat puppet? Helix may have put on a little winter weight but he is still in shape. Helix will not let himself go until AFTER he is married.

As far as a big, fat puppet wedding, Helix would have to say no. While Alyce does have a large family, he's pretty certain none of her relatives are Greek.
Question:
"I presume Alyce doesn't eat humans, as she is a sheep. Does Helix think this difference between them may cause friction?" (Darren) 

Answer:
Helix admits that early on, he did have some trouble picturing being in a serious relationship with a vegetarian. But the way Helix looks at it, it's a good thing! The fewer humans Alyce consumes, the more there are for Helix! As long as Alyce can respect Helix's appetite and doesn't try to convert him to a grass-only diet, the two should be able to work this out.

Helix is mostly concerned with mistaking one of Alyce's cute, wooly, lambs for a cat. Should Helix ever accidentially eat one of Alyce's offspring, this MIGHT cause some friction. To avoid such a tragedy, Helix has started shaking his dinner before he eats it. If it meows or hisses, Helix knows it's fine to eat. If it bleats, Helix lets it go.
Question:
Why are you wasting your time on sheep when you could be attracting cows or horses? (Paul)


Answer:
Helix does not feel he is wasting his time with Alyce the Sheep. Helix has heard many humans talk about "soul mates". Helix never believed in this concept until he met Alyce. Now, Helix is convinced that he and Alyce are "sew mates".

Cows are made of leather and have no fur to speak of. Why would Helix trade down when he can rub his horns against the wonderful, warm wool of a sheep? Cows also have no ambition. They stand around all day chewing their cuds. Helix needs more excitement in his life!

Horses are a step up. At least, they have manes. But, they also allow humans to put saddles on their backs and race them for sport. Helix finds this very degrading and he just can't be with someone (or something) if he doesn't respect what they do for a living.

By contrast, Alyce the Sheep is a successful Internet therapist. Regardless of species, she is always wiling to listen and help you solve your problems. She has beauty, brains, and a big heart. She has it all. Helix can't ever imagine feeling this way about a cow or a horse.
Question:
Are you going out with Alyce the Sheep?  I thought Alyce the Sheep was already settled down - I looked at the family photos of them at the beach. (Melodie)


Answer:
Technically, Helix is not "going out" with Alyce the Sheep. Alyce and Helix have not had their first date... YET! Helix is still in the "pitching woo" stage. He is hopeful, however, that when he asks Alyce out, she will accept.

While Alyce does appear to be settled down, none of the pictures show her wearing a ring on her trotter. Helix is certainly not a pasture-wrecker but until Alyce tells him his advances are unwelcome, Helix will use his monster charm to try and win her over.

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