Monster
Mumblings
What Humans
are Saying about Helix D. Monster!
Topic: Friends
| "I am so glad you have found a friend in ET. He has had difficulties with acceptance, as you have, for being different. I think you will make well-suited friends." (Zelda) |
| "Southern monsters like to do bascially the same things northern monsters do. Except that we talk with a drawl and are extremely polite to the people we eat, we say " Puh-lease suh, can I eat you" and "thank you kindly" and stuff. And if they say no, we just eat them anyway and say excuse me afterwards." (Anonymous) |
| "Aaaarghh! Helix who? Hulk smash Helix. Wait. Hulk remember now. Helix friend. Hello Helix-friend. Hulk is green. Like hulk other friend the Grinch and Alan Greenspan. Har, har. Helix make Hulk laugh. Hulk only orange when Hulk have stomach ache." (Hulk) |
| "I would gladly be your friend (so long as you are not going to turn up on my doorstep telling me you've spent all your monster dollars on gambling and floosies and need a sofa to sleep on....)" (Paul) |
| "I can see the danger in being friends with you. We will end up biting each other." (Anonymous) |
| "Just saw Zippy & George making a guest appearance on your website. Cool! Hopefully this will encourage the little buggers to come out of retirement. It should certainly be an incentive to Jeffrey - the last I heard he was working as a cabbie in London!" (Mandy) |
| "Type mismatch error re: Handpuppet; probablity of entity possessing sentient awareness = 0.000000000000003582474213765 % Relations declined." (Anonymous) |
| "To be truthful, I am a little hesitant to become your friend as my mother has always warned me away from furry, orange, pointy eared monsters. But, I'm feeling a little reckless and crazy today, so why not?" (Kathy) |
"I must make a confession. I am not really a 'tasty human' but an unfortunate robot, down on his luck, especially since Lost in Space finished. People make fun of me in the street, dogs mistake me for a lamp-post and do their business - most unpleasant I can assure you. But I have plans myself - plans with my fellow robots to topple the tyranny of the humans and send them all to work in mines whilst the robots get to smoke cigarrettes and drink oil." (Paul) |
| "I visited your website and learned about you! You are so cute! I want to be your friend!" (Sayaka) |
| "Helix is like my helium. He makes me laugh." (Meg) |
| "Thank you very much for the hand puppet. It is receiving much love and adoration in my home!" (Kelsey) |
| "I received my bunny hand puppet Friday. Thanks! I'm still a loyal fan and I will cherish my Orange Tic-Tacs." (Wendy) |
| "I don't have any monsters at home, but I do have a small reindeer, a polar bear and a rabbit. They live on a green cushion in my room. But I expect they're really tame compared to you." (Vicky) |
| "I think you are a very cute monster and I would like to be your friend." (Gabby) |
| "If I ever see one of your family at a store, I'll get them for you!" (Rawlph) |
| "I have had a hand puppet of sorts for many years. His name is Hermie and sometimes his cousin Hermietta visits." (Terry) |
| "Hello Helix, my name is Rawlph. I am a dog hand puppet. I have brown fur, big ears and am about 37 years old. I dont have a website. Rawlph would like to be Helix's friend. Rawlph might be old, but he feels like a kid again since he was restored 2 years ago!" (Rawlph) |
| "I want to thank you for the gift that I recieved for the Olympics contest. I love Powder and Proudly display my newest member of my household. Thank you so much and appreciate the wonderful gift prize." (Ann) |
| "A lot of people over here think the royal family are puppets!" (Linda from London) |
| "Thank you so much for sending me a valentine! I know I am loved. I will file your card in my Rolodex." (Julie) |
| "Have you heard of Canada's local celebrity puppet Ed the Sock? He even has his own show on TV. Maybe you guys are long lost distant cousins twice removed? He doesn't have horns, but he does smoke a cigar." (Patti) |
| "I went to Helix's website the other day, and I thought it was very clever. I don't know if I believe the buzz about Helix being a friendly monster however, on account of his calling anyone a tasty human implies that he does eat them on occasion." (Bibi) |
| "I am a little perplexed at your friendship inquiry. Could you grow to love me as a friend or would you ever me as anything more than a tasty morsel? I am an odd human and like becoming friends with all sorts of people and things (some of my best friends include dogs, fish, and a young turtle), but a furry, little monster who feeds on hapless humans? I am not sure if I will be able to completely drop my guard around you." (Keely) |